A feminist work in progress.

MEETINGS Monday at 4:30pm in Harlan House. Food and discussion. Feel free to bring a friend!

WHO ARE WE? Third Wave Resource Group is a student rights and resource group centered in Harlan House, at Cornell. We are a safe, comfortable environment for community members which provides information, equality and empowerment informed by feminism. We believe feminism is about values & ideals. Empowerment & education. Community building & understanding. (And calling people out on their bullshit).

RESOURCES WE PROVIDE Sexual Assault and Domestic Violence Advocacy, access to Safe Room, emergency transportation, library, kitchen, sewing room, safe zone, and confidentiality.

CONTACT 319)895-5750

NBC and Law & Order:SVU: We request that you re-consider casting convicted rapist, Mike Tyson on Law & Order:SVU ›


Please sign this petition, even if you don’t watch the show. While there are many feminist debates about this show, one thing we can all agree on is a convicted rapist should NOT be on this show. This is a slap in the face of all survivors of sexual assault/rape and the survivors who are fans of the show. This is absolutely disgusting.

There’s a poisonous double standard in our society which says that it’s reverse-sexist and wrong for women to feel threatened by creepy-awkward male behaviour because our fear implies that we hold the negative, stereotypical view that All Men Are Predators, but that if we’re raped or sexually assaulted by any man with whom we’ve had prior social interaction – and particularly if he’s expressed some sexual or romantic interest in us during that time – it’s reasonable for observers to ask what precautions we took to prevent the assault from happening, or to suggest that we maybe led the guy on by not stating our feelings plainly. The result is a situation where women are punished if we reject, avoid or identify creepy men, and then told it’s our fault if we’re assaulted by someone we plainly ought to have rejected, avoided, identified.


Rape Map, by Suzanne Lacy, 1977

Part of Lacy’s project Three Weeks in May

When throwing a punch: ›










• Use the hand you write with.

• Make a fist with your thumb outside, not tucked inside. If it’s tucked inside your fist, when you punch someone, you might break your thumb. The thumb goes across your fingers, not on the side.

• Don’t be like in the movies—don’t aim for the face. Face punches don’t usually stop people, and you can miss when they duck their head or break your hand on their jaw. If you want to get away quickly, or end a fight, aim for the chest, or the ribs. If you really want to do some damage, e.g., you’re being attacked, aim for the throat, which will make it hard for your attacker to breathe for a hot minute.

• When you punch, you want to aim and hit with your first two knuckles. Not the flats of your fingers, and not your ring or pinky knuckles, which can break more easily. You can use your weight, if you’re on your feet, to add wallop, and spring into a punch with your feet and torso.

Useful information, esp. if you haven’t taken self defense.

I reblogged this once before to add this and I’ll do it again…

keep your wrist straight.

You can also risk breaking your wrist if you allow it to bend.  I actually can’t believe this isn’t in there.

Other good pointers:

  • if your attacker is male, go for his junk - especially if he’s wearing loose pants. There’s no sportsmanship when it comes to assault so fuck them balls UP
  • punching pretty much ANYWHERE in the face is going to actually hurt you a LOT (just think - you’re punching your bones into their bones and ow). If you’re going for the face, my suggestion is to strick upwards with your palm.

see that meaty portion highlighted in red? There’s a lot of muscle and fat right there which makes it excellent for striking. Hold your hand as shown and aim for the nose or chin (though I’ve been told in extreme circumstances, doing this to the nose can be fatal but I’ve never really heard if this is true or not) and just aim upwards

  • other delicate areas: 
  • the shin (hurts like a bitch if you kick it right - also, you can hit this spot if you’re being held in a choke-hold and if your attacker has to move in order to stop you from kicking him, he’ll have to angle his body so as to expose his stomach and crotch to the wild spastic jabbings of your elbows)
  • the solar plexus (either jab while holding your hand in a sort of spear position or use your elbows - unless you’re super strong, your punch probably won’t wind your attacker. Your elbow or a spear hand will, however)
Originally in (most) martial arts, you hit the solar plexus because it supposedly contained an important chakra. Now we know that it actually also contains like a bunch of necessary organs that are exposed just below your ribs and is also (roughly) where your diaphragm lives so getting punched there is not pleasant.
  • the clavicle (from experience, getting hit in your clavicle HURTS LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER. If you strike downwards with your knuckles, the person might just cry. Like I did.)
  • the ear (this is probably the best place to punch besides the throat. It’s all cartilage so it probably won’t hurt you all that much and most people will be like “DUDE YOU PUNCHED ME IN THE EAR WHAT THE HELL”)
  • the kidneys (this is harder to hit without training but if you somehow get your attacker’s back to face you, try to hit’em in the kidneys. Again, from experience, this FUCKING HURTS. You can’t really hit the kidneys from the front with any effect but from the back it is super painful)

  • if you’re held in a choke-hold, try turning your head so the forearm isn’t pressed into your throat. If you can position yourself right, you can sort of force your chin into the crook of the elbow, making you able to still receive (limited) oxygen and provide time for you to kick some shins or elbow some spleens and shit

-Also, remember that a guy’s junk is not an off-button. Don’t think that you can rely on a swift kick to the balls to immediately incapacitate him in an emergency. Adrenaline and anger can keep somebody going for a long time even through extreme pain, and if you expect to end a fight with a single groin-attack you might be caught off-guard when he doesn’t drop. Certainly go for it if you get the chance, but keep hitting him until the fight is over.

-Draw blood if you can, especially if you can draw it from the face or the eyes. Blood in the eyes is not just a good way to impair your attacker’s vision, it’s also a really good way to freak them out and let them know that they might be getting more than they bargained for by picking a fight with you.

-Elbows and knees are really powerful weapons. Elbows are very sharp and very strong and if you are in close-range they are often more effective than trying to throw a punch. 

-Yelling and shouting makes you scary. 

-The tops of people’s feet are actually quite delicate, so a well-placed heel ramming down can break all those little bones (especially if you’re wearing heavy shoes or heels)

-It only takes 7 pounds of pressure to break a collarbone/clavicle. And I know from personal experience that getting your collarbone broken is HORRIBLE. Hitting someone with the heel of your hand or punching them may be enough to at least fracture it.

-If their arms are bare, try pinching the tendon on the inside of their elbow as hard as you can. In the self defence class I took, they told a story about how one girl actually ripped out her attacker’s tendons.

-There’s not much sense in fighting clean. Bite, scratch, pull their hair. Pull their ears. Earrings? Rip ‘em out. 

-Smacking your cupped palms really hard over someone’s ears like this can disorient  them and with enough force, burst their eardrums.


-Practice “power yelling”. Here’s a good site about it.

-And like my mum always told me, if you don’t feel safe, keep your keys between your fingers. Like Wolverine. No one wants a punch from Wolverine.

Stay safe out there!


Everyone should know how to defend themselves. Your voice is a powerful tool, yell and scream and shout. I keep my keys on a lanyard, instead of doing the whole keys between the knuckles thing. That implies you have to get close enough to this person to hit them with your fist, but a lanyard full of keys when swung with some force really packs a hit.

YES to keys on a lanyard. Whenever I used to have to walk home from work in the dark when I lived in Detroit, I kept my big bunch of keys on a lanyard and fucking swung the hell out of it as I walked.

Also this whole post is really great.

(via feminishblog)

For Afghan women, the act of fleeing domestic abuse, forced prostitution or even being stabbed repeatedly with a screwdriver by an abusive husband may land them in jail while their abusers walk free. ›

[TW: assault (physical and sexual), rape and rape culture]

An 8-year-old girl camper began swimming near the edge of the pool by me. She was a tiny girl with a bubbly personality, and she was very attached to me. Upon seeing us talking, the boy swam over and started chasing her around the water. It was clear from the way she was trying to get away from him and her screeching that she wanted to be left alone — her body language and tense demeanor should have showed that she was uncomfortable — but if that wasn’t enough of a clue, the “stop” she yelled in protest should have been enough for him to go away.

That’s when it really hit me how serious the situation was. I could immediately picture it escalating. I didn’t see an 8-year-old girl and an 11-year-old boy anymore; I saw the two of them as fully grown and matured adults. The girl was still small and skinny, and the boy was large enough to overpower her with little effort. I could see her running away from him, trying to push off his advances in a more sexual situation, but him refusing to believe that she really wanted him to stop. I saw him ignoring her physical protests right along with the verbal ones, convinced she wanted him there. It horrified me.

I reprimanded him immediately, insisting that when someone asks you to stop, it’s important to listen. Almost seconds later, a male counselor standing by the same section of the pool told him not to listen to me and to continue his pursuit of this little girl, despite her obvious protests. Here were two boys, roughly 10 years apart in age, but with the same views on women: that consent doesn’t matter. It’s not a generational thing: this mindset has clearly been ingrained into the public psyche from an early age. How often are we told not to take no for an answer? How often do we see children pestering their parents about getting a new toy until they eventually give in? How often do we hear about a woman’s whims coming with her menstrual cycle? How often do we see on television shows and in movies a woman “changing her mind” about a man who is persistent enough or who just proves himself worthy? The idea that a woman will change her mind is so ingrained that we can’t always recognize it at first.

Jackie Klein, A Lesson In Consent For All Ages, (via feminspire)

Please teach your kids, especially your sons, from an early age to respect others space and bodies.

(via face-down-asgard-up)

(via lipstick-feminists)

To those who suggest women don’t wear skimpy/revealing outfits if they expect to not get raped.


Read full quote here.

Still not asking for ‘it’.

(via sluteverxxx)


Protesters gather in Bradford, UK to show support for rape survivors after MP George Galloway’s comment that Julian Assange was just accused of “bad sexual etiquette”. Because apparently raping someone while they sleeping is just a bit rude in Mr. Galloway’s book.

Consent Culture ›


An interesting read on how the world would work if we accepted consent as one of the basic requirements of social interactions. 

Listen, buster: You don’t get to claim that you’ve got empathy for women who are raped while also denying them the right to terminate a pregnancy resulting from rape

How to tackle sexual assault on campuses – without the lectures


Excellent piece from Jill Filipovic on alternative strategies to address campus sexual assault!

Rape-prevention for students usually focuses on telling potential victims what not to do. It’s better to take a more holistic approach

In just a few weeks, summer will wind down and it’ll be time to go back to school. Students will be treated with what’s now a back-to-school standard: the lecture on how to stay safe on campus. It’s widely understood that all the advice about not walking alone after dark and having your keys ready before you get into your building isn’t given just to prevent robberies or muggings; it’s to prevent rape.

Sexual assault on college campuses is a real problem. As many as a quarter of women in US colleges will experience sexual assault or attempted sexual assault during her time in school. Nearly 90% of those women know their attacker. And despite pervasive myths about “date rape” being a simple misunderstanding between two good kids, the reality is that most rapes on campus are committed by a small handful of predatory male rapists.

Yet women on college campuses are still treated to rape-prevention advice like “don’t walk alone at night!”, “always carry cab fare!”, “don’t wear anything too provocative!” and “don’t drink too much!”

That advice isn’t working. It centres on stranger-danger and ignores the reality that the real problem is a small number of student criminals who commit assaults but are routinely protected – by friends on campus, by social myths about rape that shift the blame to women or emphasise “miscommunication”, and sometimes by the college itself.

Is it a good idea for students to avoid getting blackout drunk and to carry a cab fare and to learn self-defence? Of course. But students, like the rest of us, are human. Sometimes they’re going to do things that are fun at the time but come with risks. Standard anti-rape advice may offer some tools for individuals to protect themselves if they behave perfectly at all times, but they don’t solve the on-campus rape problem – after all, never drinking might mean that you avoid the rapist who uses alcohol to incapacitate his victims, but it doesn’t stop him from raping someone else.

So as back-to-school season approaches, here’s some real assault-prevention advice for schools and students:

Instead of fear-based sex education, emphasise healthy sexuality

A culture where sex is understood as enthusiastically consensual and pleasurable for all people involved is a culture in which the “misunderstanding” narrative of date rape will be killed dead. Instead of requiring don’t-get-raped lectures, colleges should emphasise healthy and safe sexual behaviour, and challenge stereotypes about what “real” rape looks like. Scholars such as Jaclyn Friedman offer exactly these kinds of workshops – more campuses should be calling her.

Colleges should treat sexual assault like a crime

This sounds like a no-brainer, but a disturbing number of campuses have policies that require student-on-student sexual assault to be mediated through the school, as if assault were a personal dispute instead of a crime. Of course colleges shouldn’t force students to report their assaults to the police, but they should give students the option – and provide counselling and social support for students who choose to report the crime. Too often, colleges are concerned about their own reputations at the expense of justice and student safety. Realistically, though, it’s in the colleges’ interest to remove predators from campus.

Focus on men

Rape prevention advice largely focuses on women, who are disproportionately sexually victimised (although it’s important to know that men on campus are also often victims of sexual assault, and experience similar shame and stigma). Working with men to break down stereotypes about rape victims – that women regularly lie about being raped, that acquaintance rape is simply a “she didn’t say no and he misunderstood” situation, that a woman’s behaviour is partially to blame – is a good first step.

More important, though, is giving men the tools to intervene when they see other men exhibiting predatory behaviour. We know that men who rape on campus are often serial rapists, and intentionally target women who either seem vulnerable or can be easily incapacitated through alcohol, force or some combination of the two. The best way to stop a potential rapist? Intercept him. And men can do just that if they see a friend or acquaintance pushing women’s boundaries or clearly seeking out women who seem vulnerable.

Stigmatise men who assault

Again, it seems like a no-brainer – who likes rapists? – but men who commit assaults on college campuses are often protected by their friends, teammates, fraternity brothers and their school, who write off the assaults as misunderstandings or drunken bad behaviour. Simple advice: stop doing that. If you know a guy has been behaving badly, it’s time for a good old-fashioned shunning. Jessica Valenti has other pieces of advice for outing rapists, and emphasises that speaking out about rape and information-sharing about rapists is nothing short of heroic. So if a number of women at your school are all saying that one particular guy assaulted them, or if you witness a man disrespecting women on campus, perhaps it’s time to cut him out of the friend circle.

College should be a time for intellectual, personal and, yes, sexual exploration. And all students deserve a safe campus. The way to truly deliver on that ideal is to address sexual assault holistically and purge rapists from schools – not to again lecture young women on what not to do.



Oh hell no. Find out more about this awful victim-blaming ad and what you can do to get it pulled here.

Sounds like some people could use some rape prevention tips! I recommend these:

Rape Prevention Tips

(via sluteverxxx)